So I signed up for Facebook recently.
I know.
Gasp.
Me, privacy-loving, anti-media, anti-faddish, who doesn't really want to read what anyone else is eating for breakfast, lunch or dinner, I joined friggin' Facebook. I didn't want to sign up, but I was desperate, a woman on the edge. I mean, how am I supposed to follow my favorite local mini-dairy if I don't sign up? What's a person who wants local, organic, low-temp pasteurized, non-homogenized dairy products supposed to do?
Sign up.
Anyway, one good thing that's come from signing up for Facebook is the amount of introspection it encourages. Yes, FB encourages introspection. Who'da thunk it? They ask all the questions that one wouldn't ask in polite company. What's your faith? What's your political persuasion? What's your outlook? Who shaped and inspired you? And what I've discovered is how much I've changed in the past 4 years. Many of the friends from long ago who have friended me recently probably wouldn't recognize me now. I look the same, more or less. My great-grandma always said my looks never changed, just matured. I like that. What's done a total reversal is my outlook on faith, politics, worldview, people, life. You know. Pretty much everything.
Here's what I used to believe: That Democrats were good, Republicans were bad and that you could pretty much trust the US Gov. Wow. I know. I was so young. Now I know that Dems and Reps are both off their rockers and you can't trust either. And the USGov...well, just make sure you lock your doors and keep your firearms out of sight.
I used to believe that people are basically good, smart, hard-working and want to accomplish something with their lives. That no one wants to be poor, sick or drug-addicted. Wow again.
I used to believe that vast, right-wing/left-wing, opinion-swaying conspiracy theories were something out of colorful imaginations and mystery novels. Now I believe it. See Fast and Furious for more details.
I used to support the world-policing that the US practices. Now I think we need to get our butts home and stay here until someone, oh I don't know, ASKS FOR OUR HELP.
I used to support gun control. Yeah, can you believe it? I just didn't see the need for every Tom, Dick or Harry to be sporting an assault rifle. Then I realized that freedom to bear arms is the ultimate checkmate. Why do you think the British were so keen to disarm us? Oh, I know, that was a long time ago and times change. Times change, but the heart of man doesn't.
I also used to believe that I was free to make my own choices, frame my future, raise my children the way I WANT to raise my children. No, no and no. There are czars for that.
And global warming, political correctness and the green movement...yikes, yikes, yikes.
Yeah. Everything has changed. But, to quote my BFF Suz: "It's okay. I'm not bitter."
Believe it or not, I actually have a great deal of hope for the future. I think much of America has woken up in the past couple of years to the garbage and nonsense going on behind the stage. Toto has pulled back the curtain, so to speak.
I'm at ease with the choices I've made in life. At some point, a few years ago, I woke up to the realization that you can never actually catch the rat in the old rat race. That no matter how fast you run, all you see is the rat's butt. That there's no point in trying to be/keep up with the Joneses. That enough is enough. That sometimes quiet, still and small is really superior to all else.
I find great peace in the Saviour and knowing all this nonsense is no surprise to Him. He's the one individual who really has my back, all the time and in all cases, and I owe my rescue and my hope to Him.
I'm not sure what brought on all these changes. Maturity? Motherhood? Salvation? All of the above? All I can tell you is that it's amazing the difference 4 years can make.
Showing posts with label entitlement. Show all posts
Showing posts with label entitlement. Show all posts
Monday, October 17, 2011
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Thoughts on Dependence and Irresponsibility
So it's 8am and I've been hard at work this morning, listening to the morning news show and trying to salvage my winter squash harvest; more to come on that later. Anyway, there has been a real trend to the morning show programing this morning: dependence and irresponsibility.
(Let me warn you this is going to be a rambling post.)
Story 1 on the morning show: those lousy teachers and why ~they cain't teach our kids nothin'~. Why our kids can't read, can't write, can't do a bit of 'rithmetic in their heads without using their fingers...Yes, it's the teachers' fault that our kids are way behind on everything when compared to the rest of the world.
What a great story for the media to jump on and beat to death: American kids are lacking because the teachers aren't teaching.
I know first-hand that there are some lousy teachers out there. I had at least one or two in my day. But here's the thing; as a mom to 2 in a rural public school, I'm already getting newsletters asking parents to remember to feed their children in the mornings.
~Please pack a snack because it's going to be 5-6 hours til your 5 year old eats lunch.
~Please remember to send a lunch or lunch money so your kid doesn't go hungry.
~Please dress your child appropriately as it was 44 degrees this morning when you sent your kid to school in shorts, flip flops and a tank top.
~Please send your child's school supplies so they don't have to borrow from other children.
~Please make sure your child does his homework.
~Please make sure your child sleeps each night.
Seriously. And ours is one of the top ranking districts in the area.
At what point do we stop blaming the teachers for our own failings? At what point do we begin to take personal responsibility for raising our children? These people are teachers, not miracle workers and a hungry, cold, sleepy child is absolutely not going to perform like a comfortable, nourished, secure child. For crying out loud, people....do you really need a reminder to feed your kid and stick him in a sweatshirt on a cold morning? Apparently yes or the Kindergarten teachers wouldn't be sending home these newsletters.
So let's move on to Story 2; Hurricane Irene, the government response and FEMA.
I watched ample coverage of Hurricane Irene, from the evacuations to the aftermath and let me just say I'm glad we no longer live in the Hatteras area. Horrible, bad stuff there, but I'm sure FEMA is doing good work. What unsettled me about this story were all the comments preceded by the phrase "after the lessons learned from Hurricane Katrina". "The lessons learned from Hurricane Katrina". What I learned from Katrina is that hurricanes are bad and if you know one is coming, you should get ready. Hunker down or evacuate, whichever. There will be repercussions to either choice, but you still need to make one and live with it.
What our culture seems to have learned is that you don't need to be responsible for your choices. You can choose to live 2 feet over sea level in Hurricane Alley, ignore evacuation plans, not store food, water or first aid supplies, wait til the last minute, put yourself in deathly peril and then first responders will put themselves in danger to swoop in and rescue you. Deus ex machina, baby.
Where is personal responsibility?
And the most ironic part of the story: the people complaining about the local government's actions: "There was no need to evacuate. There was no need to shut down transit. There was no need causing all that upset. They just over-reacted." I'm not a betting person, but if I were, I'd bet those complainers would be the first in line to sue had they been injured because they hadn't been forced to evacuate. Just a thought.
Story 3 for the morning: the economy and what Obama intends to do to make things right in the world. He's a-gonna lower taxes. He's a-gonna extend unemployment benefits. He's a-gonna make sure every family has a chicken in the pot and a hybrid car in the garage. He's a-gonna make sure we're not foreclosed on after we financed more than we could afford. He's a-gonna make sure we can put expensive new energy-efficient windows in our home, get provisions for kids we can't support and heat homes we couldn't afford to buy in the first place. And the best part, he's a-gonna form a committee to make sure we rural folk have an improved quality of life.
Well. I write that "Well" with all the sarcasm I can muster. I suppose I should write it like I say it...Way-ell. Followed by a Bless His Heart, assuming the Deep South/Appalachia connotation. (If you don't understand that connotation, please leave me a note.)
Where is independence and personal responsibility?
Why is it the government's job to pay for my kids, your house, his heating oil bills, their windows, my clunker car?
Why is it the government's job to ensure I have a good quality of life? How do they even define that..."good quality of life"?
We've gotten way of track somewhere in the past 10-20 years. (Maybe longer, I just don't recall what the policies, economy and politics of the 80's and 90's were like.) But the trend lately to be entirely dependent on other people and entities to care for our well-being is disturbing. The expectation that we really aren't responsible for our choices is troubling, to say the least. And what the upcoming generation is learning is positively frightening. The worst part, in my opinion, is that with the push of mainstream media, it's the new normal.
Taking care of yourself, your children, your home= Freak. Troublemaker.
Dependence, irresponsibility, reliance on others= Good. Normal.
Does anyone else feel like we've become a nation of over-indulged children?
And just a last thought, before I go cry over the remains of my butternut squash...why would governments, local, state and/or federal, go to such lengths to encourage so many people to become dependents? Why so many 'outs' for bad choices? Why so many second chances (at tax payers' expense) for irresponsible behaviors? What possible motivation could there be for creating a culture completely and totally dependent on a governing body? At one point in time, that would have been a liability. Now it seems to be an asset.
I have some thoughts on the topic, but I'm curious to hear yours.
(Let me warn you this is going to be a rambling post.)
Story 1 on the morning show: those lousy teachers and why ~they cain't teach our kids nothin'~. Why our kids can't read, can't write, can't do a bit of 'rithmetic in their heads without using their fingers...Yes, it's the teachers' fault that our kids are way behind on everything when compared to the rest of the world.
What a great story for the media to jump on and beat to death: American kids are lacking because the teachers aren't teaching.
I know first-hand that there are some lousy teachers out there. I had at least one or two in my day. But here's the thing; as a mom to 2 in a rural public school, I'm already getting newsletters asking parents to remember to feed their children in the mornings.
~Please pack a snack because it's going to be 5-6 hours til your 5 year old eats lunch.
~Please remember to send a lunch or lunch money so your kid doesn't go hungry.
~Please dress your child appropriately as it was 44 degrees this morning when you sent your kid to school in shorts, flip flops and a tank top.
~Please send your child's school supplies so they don't have to borrow from other children.
~Please make sure your child does his homework.
~Please make sure your child sleeps each night.
Seriously. And ours is one of the top ranking districts in the area.
At what point do we stop blaming the teachers for our own failings? At what point do we begin to take personal responsibility for raising our children? These people are teachers, not miracle workers and a hungry, cold, sleepy child is absolutely not going to perform like a comfortable, nourished, secure child. For crying out loud, people....do you really need a reminder to feed your kid and stick him in a sweatshirt on a cold morning? Apparently yes or the Kindergarten teachers wouldn't be sending home these newsletters.
So let's move on to Story 2; Hurricane Irene, the government response and FEMA.
I watched ample coverage of Hurricane Irene, from the evacuations to the aftermath and let me just say I'm glad we no longer live in the Hatteras area. Horrible, bad stuff there, but I'm sure FEMA is doing good work. What unsettled me about this story were all the comments preceded by the phrase "after the lessons learned from Hurricane Katrina". "The lessons learned from Hurricane Katrina". What I learned from Katrina is that hurricanes are bad and if you know one is coming, you should get ready. Hunker down or evacuate, whichever. There will be repercussions to either choice, but you still need to make one and live with it.
What our culture seems to have learned is that you don't need to be responsible for your choices. You can choose to live 2 feet over sea level in Hurricane Alley, ignore evacuation plans, not store food, water or first aid supplies, wait til the last minute, put yourself in deathly peril and then first responders will put themselves in danger to swoop in and rescue you. Deus ex machina, baby.
Where is personal responsibility?
And the most ironic part of the story: the people complaining about the local government's actions: "There was no need to evacuate. There was no need to shut down transit. There was no need causing all that upset. They just over-reacted." I'm not a betting person, but if I were, I'd bet those complainers would be the first in line to sue had they been injured because they hadn't been forced to evacuate. Just a thought.
Story 3 for the morning: the economy and what Obama intends to do to make things right in the world. He's a-gonna lower taxes. He's a-gonna extend unemployment benefits. He's a-gonna make sure every family has a chicken in the pot and a hybrid car in the garage. He's a-gonna make sure we're not foreclosed on after we financed more than we could afford. He's a-gonna make sure we can put expensive new energy-efficient windows in our home, get provisions for kids we can't support and heat homes we couldn't afford to buy in the first place. And the best part, he's a-gonna form a committee to make sure we rural folk have an improved quality of life.
Well. I write that "Well" with all the sarcasm I can muster. I suppose I should write it like I say it...Way-ell. Followed by a Bless His Heart, assuming the Deep South/Appalachia connotation. (If you don't understand that connotation, please leave me a note.)
Where is independence and personal responsibility?
Why is it the government's job to pay for my kids, your house, his heating oil bills, their windows, my clunker car?
Why is it the government's job to ensure I have a good quality of life? How do they even define that..."good quality of life"?
We've gotten way of track somewhere in the past 10-20 years. (Maybe longer, I just don't recall what the policies, economy and politics of the 80's and 90's were like.) But the trend lately to be entirely dependent on other people and entities to care for our well-being is disturbing. The expectation that we really aren't responsible for our choices is troubling, to say the least. And what the upcoming generation is learning is positively frightening. The worst part, in my opinion, is that with the push of mainstream media, it's the new normal.
Taking care of yourself, your children, your home= Freak. Troublemaker.
Dependence, irresponsibility, reliance on others= Good. Normal.
Does anyone else feel like we've become a nation of over-indulged children?
And just a last thought, before I go cry over the remains of my butternut squash...why would governments, local, state and/or federal, go to such lengths to encourage so many people to become dependents? Why so many 'outs' for bad choices? Why so many second chances (at tax payers' expense) for irresponsible behaviors? What possible motivation could there be for creating a culture completely and totally dependent on a governing body? At one point in time, that would have been a liability. Now it seems to be an asset.
I have some thoughts on the topic, but I'm curious to hear yours.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Thoughts On Heirloom Skills
This post could so easily turn into a rant.
That's not my intention, but it could. Just saying...........
The past few days, the subject of heirloom skills has been a hot topic in my house. You know, heirloom skills, plain old basic life skills that used to be passed down from one generation to the next, much like Great-Granny's English tea pot. These skills were learned by little girls at the elbows of their mothers and grandmothers and when the little girl was grown, she could apply that skill in her own life and pass it down to her daughters. (I say daughters, mothers, grandmothers, but you could just as easily replace those terms with sons, fathers, grandfathers.) I remember doing that; learning plain old basic life skills by working next to my mom and grandmother and my favorite aunt Vickie.
I remember springtimes spent in the garden, watering transplants with buckets of water brought up from the creek. Summers were spent juicing, snapping, shucking, milling, canning and freezing in the cinder block summer kitchen. The wild black raspberries ripened in mid- to late-summer and oh how thrilling it was when Papaw climbed over the farm fence and disappeared for an hour picking berries! It seems like he'd always come back with gallons and gallons of fresh black raspberries that we'd turn into jellies, cobblers and freeze for winter. At least the ones that made it to the kitchen. A fair number of them never made it beyond the walk back from the orchard.
In fall, there were gorgeous fruit harvests of apples and peaches followed by peeling, saucing, buttering and canning. I remember one year having brown hands from all the peaches I helped Mom peel and turn into peach butter. I was about 13 and I was so embarrassed of my brown hands and stained fingernails! I wasn't so embarrassed when it came time to top mom's homemade biscuits with peach butter! That was some good eating right there.
Wintertime was the greatest because all our efforts came inside. Thanksgiving was a huge affair, with a full spread of food, all homemade and much of it homegrown. There was no instant this and just add water that. It was full-fat, full-calorie, full-flavor and made in bulk to accommodate all the aunts, uncles, cousins and grandchildren. I remember homemade gifts and Christmas cakes baked from scratch. And homemade toffee candies made with black walnuts that we gathered from the tree next door in Mr. Adam's yard. I remember homemade peach and apple pies every year for Mamaw's birthdays, made from homegrown peaches and locally grown apples. I remember Mom crocheting baby blankets and Mamaw making quilts when her old ones wore through. And when spring came around again, Easter was a huge celebration, with homemade cakes and candies. Our lives revolved around the seasons and our time was spent close to home. And with few exceptions, I cannot imagine a more idyllic childhood.
Somewhere over the past couple generations, that's all changed.
Life is spent at a hurried pace, going from one activity to another. From school to sports to community functions to take-out restaurant then back home again to hurriedly get a few scant hours of sleep in order to start all over again. Not that there's anything inherently wrong with those activities, but home and the family unit have been neglected in the process. Hours spent together in the kitchen learning to cook whole foods have been swapped for fast food in order to free up time for watching TV. Hard work and sweat in the garden have been traded in exchange for manicures and shopping sprees. We don't produce anything; we simply consume. We rack up debt to free up our time and then poison ourselves with convenience foods because we're simply too tired to cook. What the frig??????
Now what we have is a generation of Americans who aren't capable of survival. I don't mean survival as in Bear Grylls and roughing in the wilderness with only a package of matches and a tarp. I mean cooking foods in their most basic form and mending a pair of jeans to last through the winter. I'm talking about nourishing our family's tummies and spirits with simple hearty fare that we grew through our own labors. Scrapping together a thick, fluffy, warm blanket to snuggle under on a cold winter day. The skills of 3-4 generations ago are long-forgotten and have been replaced by mind-numbing, budget-killing, body-sickening hobbies and habits.
We're now enslaved by convenience. Do you realize that? What was once pleasant and convenient has now become a necessity and big businesses are laughing all the way to the bank. Processed, packaged foods have become a staple because we've forgotten basic cooking skills. Manufactured clothing has become a necessity because we've forgotten the ability to sew. We're reliant on goods shipped from overseas because we've outsourced our skills for convenience and leisure. We don't know how to sew, quilt, cook, work leather, make soap, tap trees, heal ourselves with herbs, raise livestock, brew ales, make yogurt, construct simple furniture. We absolutely refuse to make do or do without...that would be beneath our dignity. After all, we're Americans and we're entitled to a certain quality of life. And so we're now slaves to big business and mass consumerism; oh and the debt that goes along with it. In so many ways we're like children; reliant upon someone else to take care of our most basic needs.
We make fun of folks on welfare and look down our noses at entitlements, but honestly, are we any different? We are nearly 100% dependent on other people to feed us, cloth us, heal us and give us a warm place to sleep. The question is, where does this all end? At what point do we learn again to take care of ourselves? At what point do we free ourselves from bondage and use the skills of our forefathers in order to provide for ourselves?
If you don't know these skills, honestly, I'm not picking on you. Our generation is the product of a crazy environment and an ever-maddening culture, but that's no excuse not to move beyond what we know and develop skills that will enrich our lives and that of our family. There are so many resources available now to people who only look for them. County extension offices offer courses in gardening and canning. Local hardware stores teach classes on basic plumbing and carpentry. Family-run greenhouses and garden centers can teach you the basics of planting a garden or using herbs. Craft and fabric stores often teach elementary sewing. And if none of that pans out, there are surrogate grannies to be found everywhere who would love to trade their skills for an afternoon with a captive audience! There is a wealth of information to be had online, you just have to take the time to find it. And old books, they're the greatest at teaching basic skills. Watch garage sales and auctions for old home economics books, pre-WWII 'receipt' books, Girl/Boy Scout manuals. They can be bought for practically nothing but are full of essential information.
Our culture is so big on the acquisition of stuff, especially if it promises to make life easier, but now it's time to turn away from that and work on the acquisition of knowledge and relationships. It's time to build a home and a family, to develop our minds and expand our culture beyond what pop-media tells us is trendy. Can you think of a better time to start than right now?
That's not my intention, but it could. Just saying...........
The past few days, the subject of heirloom skills has been a hot topic in my house. You know, heirloom skills, plain old basic life skills that used to be passed down from one generation to the next, much like Great-Granny's English tea pot. These skills were learned by little girls at the elbows of their mothers and grandmothers and when the little girl was grown, she could apply that skill in her own life and pass it down to her daughters. (I say daughters, mothers, grandmothers, but you could just as easily replace those terms with sons, fathers, grandfathers.) I remember doing that; learning plain old basic life skills by working next to my mom and grandmother and my favorite aunt Vickie.
I remember springtimes spent in the garden, watering transplants with buckets of water brought up from the creek. Summers were spent juicing, snapping, shucking, milling, canning and freezing in the cinder block summer kitchen. The wild black raspberries ripened in mid- to late-summer and oh how thrilling it was when Papaw climbed over the farm fence and disappeared for an hour picking berries! It seems like he'd always come back with gallons and gallons of fresh black raspberries that we'd turn into jellies, cobblers and freeze for winter. At least the ones that made it to the kitchen. A fair number of them never made it beyond the walk back from the orchard.
In fall, there were gorgeous fruit harvests of apples and peaches followed by peeling, saucing, buttering and canning. I remember one year having brown hands from all the peaches I helped Mom peel and turn into peach butter. I was about 13 and I was so embarrassed of my brown hands and stained fingernails! I wasn't so embarrassed when it came time to top mom's homemade biscuits with peach butter! That was some good eating right there.
Wintertime was the greatest because all our efforts came inside. Thanksgiving was a huge affair, with a full spread of food, all homemade and much of it homegrown. There was no instant this and just add water that. It was full-fat, full-calorie, full-flavor and made in bulk to accommodate all the aunts, uncles, cousins and grandchildren. I remember homemade gifts and Christmas cakes baked from scratch. And homemade toffee candies made with black walnuts that we gathered from the tree next door in Mr. Adam's yard. I remember homemade peach and apple pies every year for Mamaw's birthdays, made from homegrown peaches and locally grown apples. I remember Mom crocheting baby blankets and Mamaw making quilts when her old ones wore through. And when spring came around again, Easter was a huge celebration, with homemade cakes and candies. Our lives revolved around the seasons and our time was spent close to home. And with few exceptions, I cannot imagine a more idyllic childhood.
Somewhere over the past couple generations, that's all changed.
Life is spent at a hurried pace, going from one activity to another. From school to sports to community functions to take-out restaurant then back home again to hurriedly get a few scant hours of sleep in order to start all over again. Not that there's anything inherently wrong with those activities, but home and the family unit have been neglected in the process. Hours spent together in the kitchen learning to cook whole foods have been swapped for fast food in order to free up time for watching TV. Hard work and sweat in the garden have been traded in exchange for manicures and shopping sprees. We don't produce anything; we simply consume. We rack up debt to free up our time and then poison ourselves with convenience foods because we're simply too tired to cook. What the frig??????
Now what we have is a generation of Americans who aren't capable of survival. I don't mean survival as in Bear Grylls and roughing in the wilderness with only a package of matches and a tarp. I mean cooking foods in their most basic form and mending a pair of jeans to last through the winter. I'm talking about nourishing our family's tummies and spirits with simple hearty fare that we grew through our own labors. Scrapping together a thick, fluffy, warm blanket to snuggle under on a cold winter day. The skills of 3-4 generations ago are long-forgotten and have been replaced by mind-numbing, budget-killing, body-sickening hobbies and habits.
We're now enslaved by convenience. Do you realize that? What was once pleasant and convenient has now become a necessity and big businesses are laughing all the way to the bank. Processed, packaged foods have become a staple because we've forgotten basic cooking skills. Manufactured clothing has become a necessity because we've forgotten the ability to sew. We're reliant on goods shipped from overseas because we've outsourced our skills for convenience and leisure. We don't know how to sew, quilt, cook, work leather, make soap, tap trees, heal ourselves with herbs, raise livestock, brew ales, make yogurt, construct simple furniture. We absolutely refuse to make do or do without...that would be beneath our dignity. After all, we're Americans and we're entitled to a certain quality of life. And so we're now slaves to big business and mass consumerism; oh and the debt that goes along with it. In so many ways we're like children; reliant upon someone else to take care of our most basic needs.
We make fun of folks on welfare and look down our noses at entitlements, but honestly, are we any different? We are nearly 100% dependent on other people to feed us, cloth us, heal us and give us a warm place to sleep. The question is, where does this all end? At what point do we learn again to take care of ourselves? At what point do we free ourselves from bondage and use the skills of our forefathers in order to provide for ourselves?
If you don't know these skills, honestly, I'm not picking on you. Our generation is the product of a crazy environment and an ever-maddening culture, but that's no excuse not to move beyond what we know and develop skills that will enrich our lives and that of our family. There are so many resources available now to people who only look for them. County extension offices offer courses in gardening and canning. Local hardware stores teach classes on basic plumbing and carpentry. Family-run greenhouses and garden centers can teach you the basics of planting a garden or using herbs. Craft and fabric stores often teach elementary sewing. And if none of that pans out, there are surrogate grannies to be found everywhere who would love to trade their skills for an afternoon with a captive audience! There is a wealth of information to be had online, you just have to take the time to find it. And old books, they're the greatest at teaching basic skills. Watch garage sales and auctions for old home economics books, pre-WWII 'receipt' books, Girl/Boy Scout manuals. They can be bought for practically nothing but are full of essential information.
Our culture is so big on the acquisition of stuff, especially if it promises to make life easier, but now it's time to turn away from that and work on the acquisition of knowledge and relationships. It's time to build a home and a family, to develop our minds and expand our culture beyond what pop-media tells us is trendy. Can you think of a better time to start than right now?
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Entitlement
Argh. Just the word irritates me. So, dear friends, you can expect this to be an angry, rambling post. Just so you're warned. : )
Recently I read a favorite blog about a lovely woman named Sharon who has chosen to lead a life off the grid. While her husband has a 40-hour a week job, she stays at home with her boys, they raise chickens, grow their own food, line dry their clothes, heat and cook over a wood stove, etc. They're an *obviously* happy family with *obviously* healthy kids leading a life that suits them well. Period. Some of her choices are a little different than mine, but to each their own, right? What came out of the comments section of her blog was the suggestion that she is abusing her kids because she doesn't keep her house *warm enough*. While 58 is a bit cool for us, who decides what is abuse and what isn't? Who decides what we're entitled to, what is a right and what is a luxury?
It's my humble opinion that the decline of our society has come out of the post-WWII economic boom. Suddenly everyone had money, plenty of money, leisure time, lots of leisure time and a warped sense of what is right, what is abuse and what we're entitled to. 100 years ago it would been the height of insanity to suggest that we're entitled to enormous homes, central air and heating, name-brand store-bought food and brand new clothes at the change of every season. Cool homes were a fact of life. Hard work was a fact of life. Hand me down clothes were a fact of life. Cutting back during the dark days of winter were a fact of life. Then suddenly comes along the "American dream. " 3 bedroom homes with a car in every garage, central air conditioning, TV dinners, famous maker shoes, brand-name toilet paper and weekends at the country club.
What started out as a dream became a right. That dream warped, evolved, morphed, divided and conquered its way through the 50's, 60's, 70's, 80's, 90's and now into the new millennium. Luxuries of the last millennium; heat, food, clothing, education are now a staple of life in modern America, for which we're obviously thankful. But sadly, they've been replaced with shallow, self-serving, mass-produced idols that we mistakenly view as necessities. At some point, thanks to mass-media, slick politicking, psycho-babble and a heap of self-delusion, we've convinced ourselves that we are deserving and entitled to the 'good things' in life, regardless of whether we need them, deserve them, can afford them or whether they're healthy and wholesome.
And to me, what is even more disheartening, is that if you fit somewhere outside that 'framework' of entitlement and consumption, there's something wrong with you, probably mentally.
"Are you serious, no HBO channels?
What do you mean you (choke) buy off-brand toiletries?
Seriously? From a yard sale?
You mean you won't spend 40 dollars on a child's Halloween costume?
Gasp and swoon, that's child abuse!!!!"
When is enough enough? How much do we have to own, buy, consume before we believe that we're worthy, valuable, comfortable? How much do we owe our kids? Is it abuse to deny them Nick Jr and an overheated room full of imported toys?
I feel like I'm caught in a whirlpool at times. When you're at the top, in the outer waves, you don't notice it really. Just a lovely calm swirling, a gentle rocking. But then it begins to pull a little harder. You spin a little more quickly. It takes stronger treading to keep above the waves. Then you're pulled into the funnel, and no matter how hard you swim, there's no getting out. That seems like our society today. The outer waves are drawing you in, showing you the pleasures of consumption, the satisfying draw of buying what you want because you 'deserve' it, then the sinking as you realize that enough is never enough. That you need more. A greater idol, a stronger fix, a more expensive right to the best Corporate America has to offer. And it never stops.
It's only lately that I've discovered that I don't want to be in the whirlpool anymore. That there are things out there more important than convenience, comfort and fitting into the 'framework.' That I can be just as satisfied with a small house, used clothes, off-brand toilet paper and weekends at home. That in taking small steps to live more independently, I honor my ancestors who worked so hard to get me where I am today. I guess what I want to say is "Stop the whirlpool, I'm getting out!"
I'm finished competing for the cutest kids clothes, the biggest TVs, the most elite preschools, the biggest house. I've decided that I'm not depriving my kids by canceling the Noggin channel and refusing to buy 'fruit' chewy candies. I'm not abusing them by keeping our house cool, buying secondhand clothes and toys and making them share their possessions. I think my children are growing up with a realistic view of what the world really is, and more important what it isn't. It isn't a purple and pink glittery princess fairyland where their happy subjects dance around them in an endless desire to fulfill their every wish. In my humble opinion, that constitutes mental abuse, because WOW! what a trauma when they find out that that world doesn't exist. My kids are at their happiest with full bellies, warm feet, snuggling under a 'sicky' blanket with mom and dad. But those are the simple things we're all entitled to, right?
Recently I read a favorite blog about a lovely woman named Sharon who has chosen to lead a life off the grid. While her husband has a 40-hour a week job, she stays at home with her boys, they raise chickens, grow their own food, line dry their clothes, heat and cook over a wood stove, etc. They're an *obviously* happy family with *obviously* healthy kids leading a life that suits them well. Period. Some of her choices are a little different than mine, but to each their own, right? What came out of the comments section of her blog was the suggestion that she is abusing her kids because she doesn't keep her house *warm enough*. While 58 is a bit cool for us, who decides what is abuse and what isn't? Who decides what we're entitled to, what is a right and what is a luxury?
It's my humble opinion that the decline of our society has come out of the post-WWII economic boom. Suddenly everyone had money, plenty of money, leisure time, lots of leisure time and a warped sense of what is right, what is abuse and what we're entitled to. 100 years ago it would been the height of insanity to suggest that we're entitled to enormous homes, central air and heating, name-brand store-bought food and brand new clothes at the change of every season. Cool homes were a fact of life. Hard work was a fact of life. Hand me down clothes were a fact of life. Cutting back during the dark days of winter were a fact of life. Then suddenly comes along the "American dream. " 3 bedroom homes with a car in every garage, central air conditioning, TV dinners, famous maker shoes, brand-name toilet paper and weekends at the country club.
What started out as a dream became a right. That dream warped, evolved, morphed, divided and conquered its way through the 50's, 60's, 70's, 80's, 90's and now into the new millennium. Luxuries of the last millennium; heat, food, clothing, education are now a staple of life in modern America, for which we're obviously thankful. But sadly, they've been replaced with shallow, self-serving, mass-produced idols that we mistakenly view as necessities. At some point, thanks to mass-media, slick politicking, psycho-babble and a heap of self-delusion, we've convinced ourselves that we are deserving and entitled to the 'good things' in life, regardless of whether we need them, deserve them, can afford them or whether they're healthy and wholesome.
And to me, what is even more disheartening, is that if you fit somewhere outside that 'framework' of entitlement and consumption, there's something wrong with you, probably mentally.
"Are you serious, no HBO channels?
What do you mean you (choke) buy off-brand toiletries?
Seriously? From a yard sale?
You mean you won't spend 40 dollars on a child's Halloween costume?
Gasp and swoon, that's child abuse!!!!"
When is enough enough? How much do we have to own, buy, consume before we believe that we're worthy, valuable, comfortable? How much do we owe our kids? Is it abuse to deny them Nick Jr and an overheated room full of imported toys?
I feel like I'm caught in a whirlpool at times. When you're at the top, in the outer waves, you don't notice it really. Just a lovely calm swirling, a gentle rocking. But then it begins to pull a little harder. You spin a little more quickly. It takes stronger treading to keep above the waves. Then you're pulled into the funnel, and no matter how hard you swim, there's no getting out. That seems like our society today. The outer waves are drawing you in, showing you the pleasures of consumption, the satisfying draw of buying what you want because you 'deserve' it, then the sinking as you realize that enough is never enough. That you need more. A greater idol, a stronger fix, a more expensive right to the best Corporate America has to offer. And it never stops.
It's only lately that I've discovered that I don't want to be in the whirlpool anymore. That there are things out there more important than convenience, comfort and fitting into the 'framework.' That I can be just as satisfied with a small house, used clothes, off-brand toilet paper and weekends at home. That in taking small steps to live more independently, I honor my ancestors who worked so hard to get me where I am today. I guess what I want to say is "Stop the whirlpool, I'm getting out!"
I'm finished competing for the cutest kids clothes, the biggest TVs, the most elite preschools, the biggest house. I've decided that I'm not depriving my kids by canceling the Noggin channel and refusing to buy 'fruit' chewy candies. I'm not abusing them by keeping our house cool, buying secondhand clothes and toys and making them share their possessions. I think my children are growing up with a realistic view of what the world really is, and more important what it isn't. It isn't a purple and pink glittery princess fairyland where their happy subjects dance around them in an endless desire to fulfill their every wish. In my humble opinion, that constitutes mental abuse, because WOW! what a trauma when they find out that that world doesn't exist. My kids are at their happiest with full bellies, warm feet, snuggling under a 'sicky' blanket with mom and dad. But those are the simple things we're all entitled to, right?
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